Pornography: I want to help! But how?
Wednesday April 4th, 2018
You may be a parent, a loved one or a friend who just discovered that someone you care about struggles with pornography and are wondering how you can help. Let me first start with recommending that we need to eliminate the aspects of guilt and shame. The individual you love is already struggling and doesn’t need any more negativity added to their current situation.
How can you offer hope and support?
Start by asking yourself, does my loved one feel safe confiding in me? You need to create a safe space of support and understanding so your loved one will be open to what comes next. You also need to check yourself for any judgmental feelings you have towards the use of pornography.
Once a person feels safe to confide in you, then you can shift into offering hope. Hope is the beginning of something new and brings with it change! This can be done through one word: Accountability. You could help through installing accountability programs that can be used on any devices that your loved one frequencies. As well, the best accountability program you can offer is yourself. For example, when your loved one feels tempted to access porn, they can call or text you. This will look different depending on who you’re trying to support.
From creating a safe space of support to establishing hope, what you are doing is truly providing the help they need.
For additional support, the Cambridge Pregnancy Resource/Dawn Centre can be a safe place for individuals to find a listening ear and community referrals throughout their journey of hope.